literature

Shell

Deviation Actions

kazkayde's avatar
By
Published:
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Literature Text

in the same bed
but miles away from
one another

a loving touch
makes me flinch
please don't look at me

i'm broken
and left feeling
dis-membered
dis-functional
un-pretty
un-wanted

and many other words
that begin with
"dis"
"un"

i am cracked
i am hurt

my skin forms a coup against me

i cry myself to sleep
trying to wish the pain away

i wake up distraught
bandages still wrapped
around my hands
and feet

useless
helpless

i crawl to the mirror
and watch it shatter
along with my confidence
Recently I was diagnosed with Psoriasis which leaves my hands and feet covered in tiny "pimples" accompanied with dry, burning, itchy skin that often cripples me. Some days it hurts to walk.

Now I'm left with this ugliness that I can't seem to rid myself of, this disformity that I just can't get used to....
© 2009 - 2024 kazkayde
Comments15
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hollie-dolly's avatar
your poem pulls on my heart strings.
(sorry you probably didn't want an essay^-^)

I had my psoriasis for 5 years now, it started when i was 12 on my scalp and progressed to 75% of my body, every morning before school my mum had to scrape my scalp with a metal comb taking off layers of skin and blood then applied stronge steriods, it burned like hell and most mornings I cried, even when it was over, some how i felt violated. Going to hospital for treatment had really cut deep into my self esteem, I had to strip down whilst student nurses examined my body, i just wanted to die, i really had wanted to die.
i hid away from people, while everyone hung out at parties, i stayed at home. I can relate to you completely and your not alone.
now I found something that works for me. For the first time in 5 years I can wear a short sleaved shirt.

i don't think I would be the same person if i didn't have psoriasis. It makes us stronger, mentally.